Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
it was like having sex with a tree stump
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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