I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
