is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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