When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
