You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize