can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
