Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
