Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
