She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize