Just cropdusted the office
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
