Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
