i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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