i already hear my dad disowning me
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
