why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
