He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
