There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize