I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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