know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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