For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
