Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
