Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize