Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Michael Bay diarrhea
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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