they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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