My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
