When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
