How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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