the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
