dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
