You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
