You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
