I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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