making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
