I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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