And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize