seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
