you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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