You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
someone owes me an orgasm
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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