That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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