Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
