I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
