I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
