ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize