I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
fuck your aforementioned shoe
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
