No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
