Will you blow on my dice?
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize