I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
