Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize