Sponge bath it is.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
