So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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