i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
